Actual Photo of the Sexiest Pig Alive

Donald Trump just made a new enemy. Miss Piggy today lashed out at the Republican nominee for using her name to disparage Alicia Machado, a beauty queen who gained weight after winning the Miss Universe title. In a Facebook post, the curvy diva took exception to Trump’s insinuation that beauty and girth are mutually exclusive.

“Oh, Donnie, if you only knew of what you speak. Believe moi, you couldn’t handle the kind of economy size beauté I bring to the table. You know what they say: once you’ve had pork, there’s no putting down your fork. But don’t make the mistake of thinking you’d ever have a shot at one as sexy, refined, beautiful and talented as moi.”

The post ended with a patented Miss Piggy verbal karate chop.

“I’ll kiss a frog before I’ll ever get caught rolling around in the mud with the likes of you, mon Donnie…