We All Know A Brock Turner | HuffPost

I don’t know how I missed this article in 2016 since I am such a regular reader of the Huffington Post, but I did. I certainly am glad I found it now since it so directly supports the theory that it really is all men, we are just waiting for the right situation.

I think men have to start asking their wives, girlfriends, sisters, cousins, friends and, then, believing them when they tell them about being groped, kissed without permission, propositioned aggressively, come on to by bosses, teachers, or other authority figures.

The night he raped a woman behind a dumpster, Brock took a photo of her naked breasts and sent it to his buddies in a group chat. Judging from the screenshots that surfaced online, none of his friends seemed to think this was weird.

Apparently, men send women unsolicited dick pics, demand nude photos, send nude pictures of women without their permission. All of these things are forms of sexual assault. That men receive nude photos of women as trophies of conquests without strongly objecting is strong evidence that men are just waiting for the right situation.

We All Know A Brock Turner

Every major social shift begins with an uncomfortable conversation. Let’s talk.

RJ Newell 09/06/2016 Updated Sep 07, 2016


I’ve met my own Brock Turner.

That said, I’m pretty sure most of us (if not all) have come across a few versions of him at some point in our lives. At best, we know him as a mere acquaintance who “does dumb stuff at parties,” but is “a really good guy at heart.” At worst, we know him as the boyfriend/classmate/relative/friend who does the unthinkable… and either nobody believes that he did it, or they do and nothing happens.

Most guys like Brock Turner never even go to jail. And most girls, like the one he raped, are forced to live with the consequences. 1 in 5 of us, in fact, according to statistics. But when I align that number with my own personal experience and that of my friends, it’s the majority (not the minority) who have been sexually assaulted at least once. I can count on one hand the number of girlfriends I had in college who had never been sexually assaulted in some form.

Continue reading at Huffington Post: We All Know A Brock Turner | HuffPost

5 replies »

  1. Jack, I’m going to twist just a bit contrarian on this topic and try on for size a radical notion. So long as we continue to repeat the belief (and, it is a belief, not a fact) that “all men are like that”, men will continue to think they have permission and/or “can’t help it”, and women will continue to expect men to be that way. The behavior is, I will submit, not biologically determined, but cultural, the product of a world view. That is what needs to change, and men listening to and believing women is the place to start, along with dumping that stupid business about a woman and a rib and an apple.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Howdy Bob!

      I appreciate your thoughts on this. And, you do have something there. There is that fine line between granting permission for a behavior and understanding the cause of the behavior. One of the things that got me started on this line of thought was a rape prevention program developed in Canada that taught women to treat every man as a potential rapist and to react as soon as things started going badly. I learned about this prevention program about the same time as I the #MeToo movement started. Once you start realizing how many women have stories about bosses, co-workers, friends, acquaintances, uncles, cousins, strangers etc. It started to occur to me that sexual aggression may be evolutionary.

      I would also tweak the notion that behavior is cultural. Behavior is situational (according to social psychologists) and part of the situation is culture. The other determinant of behavior is disposition (personality, mood, etc). So, what do we do with an unconscious woman behind a dumpster? It is a test that I hope no man fails, but many do.


      Liked by 1 person

      • Many do indeed. The #MeToo stories caused me to review some interactions in my life and wonder, “Did she really want to do that, or did she think it was expected or required?” I’m long out of contact with the women involved and can’t ask, so there the questions sit, uncomfortably.

        Liked by 1 person

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