Anyone who has not been blackout drunk all week — and who hasn’t at least wanted to be, right? — knows that the Ol’ Pussy Grabber isn’t up to his lovable hi-jinks again and leaving chaos, confusion, consternation, death, and destruction in his wake as he blunders through life. This time it is the Kurds who will be paying the price in blood and pain.
Turkey tinhorn dictator, Recep Erdogan, convinced the Ol’ Pussy Grabber that he could win hisself a Nobel Piece Price (sic) by using his great and unmatched wisdom and end America’s endless wars by removing all 50 — such a big number, more than all your fingers and toes combined! — member of the Special Forces contingent stationed in Northern Syria with the Kurds.
If this sounds familiar, that’s because this whole scenario played out last January except that time, General Mathis resigned and it so shook the Ol’ Pussy Grabber that he changed his mind and didn’t follow through with the withdrawal. Now that there ain’t no Mathis to resign no more and only Sister Lindsey to argle-bargle over the Kurds, the Ol’ Pussy Grabber is sure that he’s struck a decisive blow for the Nobel Piece Prize by ending our endless wars and bring 50 of our soldiers south. Who knew it would be so easy?
Erdogan, like every government in the world, knows that the Ol’ Pussy Grabber is (a) transactional, (b) easily manipulated, and (c) for sale cheap. All he had to do whisper sweet nothings of “value” into the Ol’ Pussy Grabber’s ear — dirt on the Bidens, another tower in Istanbul, greater occupancy by the Turkish government of his properties, a shiny penny. A song, a promise, and some light praise is all it takes to get him going along with whatever you want him to. A lesson Iwanka has known since being a tween, and that’s why she’s his favorite.
The Kurds have been the stalwart allies that we needed in the region. They lost 11,000 fighters in pushing ISIS to the brink of destruction. And, this isn’t the first time they’ve been helpful to us. They fought on our side in all of the Iraq wars that America has had. And, we’ve tossed them to the wolves every time afterward. It’s almost as American a tradition as Lucy, Charlie Brown, and the damned football.
Call Your Members of Congress
In a rare turn of events, Dems, Repubes, and the Ol’ Pussy Grabber have condemned the Turkish incursion, and there has been legislation proposed in both houses to sanction Turkey. Frequent bipartisan collaborators, Senators Graham (R-Trump’s Ass) and Van Hollen (D-I can’t believe I have to work with these guys) have outlined a bill.
Over in the House Eliot Engel, the chair of the Foreign Affairs Committee, and ranking member, Michael McCaul, have a sanctions bill that would sanction Turkey for attacking the Kurds in Syria.
For his part, the great and unmatched wisdom that is the Ol’ Pussy Grabber has promised to destroy and obliterate the Turkish economy if they do anything off limits. We’re seeing the pay off of three years of unfulfilled bluff and bluster now, I guess.
Who could’ve predicted that should the US start bringing the troops home and end America’s endless wars — the Ol’ Pussy Grabber has always opposed America’s endless ward, always — by removing the 50 member contingent of special forces stationed with the Kurds that Turkey would’ve immediately attacked them?!? Who could’ve predicted that? The Ol’ Pussy Grabber has threatened him. THREATENED him in his all powerful tweets. If it keeps the Congressional Repubes in line, it will certainly keep tinhorned dictators like Erdogan in line, too, or at least convince his base that he has done all that is humanly possible to protect the Kurds and strike a decisive blow for ending America’s endless wars.
- Call your senators and tell them you support the Graham-Van Hollen legislation.
- Call your representative and tell them you support the Engel-McCaul legislation
- Tell all of them to sign on as co-sponsors when the legislation is drafted.
- Ask all of them to speak out publicly against this withdrawal of US forces and implore Trump to work for a ceasefire and put our troops back in place.
Tips for Calling
When you call your representative’s office, please remember the following:
- Ask for the aide working on foreign policy-related issues.
- Be polite! No matter whose office you’re calling. No matter what their positions are. No matter how inflamed you are about impeachment — and you should be very passionate — be polite.
- Remember that the people you are talking to are people! So, be nice.
- Call during business hours of the area code their office is in. Typically, that is 9:00 AM to 5:00 PM.
- Have a script or notes to follow so you don’t forget anything.
- Maybe call with friends. You know like a party.
Contacting Your MoC
Find out how to contact your MoC using these links!
- Common Cause will give you the names, party affiliation, direct phone number, website link, and social media platforms of all of your federal, state, and local elected officials.
- Call My Congress: Uses your zip code to locate your Congressional Representative and your Senators. And, it returns phone numbers, tweeter handle, party affiliation, voting record, and link to C-Span appearances!
- 5 Calls: I am sad to report that Call Your Rep is no longer supported, but you can sign-up for 5 Calls which is a service that will help you contact your Congressional representatives and keep you abreast of on going issues that are important to you! Now, that is a good deal.
- The Capital Hill Switch Board: (202) 224-3121.
- MassacreMitch and #MoscowMitch: (202) 224-2541. Call him throughout the recess!
- Nancy Pelosi: Her DC office, (202) 225-4965; her California office, (415) 556-4862