I keep wanting to write about our next president, Mike Pence. You know the uptight Casper look-alike? I didn’t realize they made white people who were ACTUALLY white! That guy makes my lily-white ass look tanned! You know, him. The terrifying one in the line of suck Sessions (see what I did there? I finally get to be the cool funny kid in 8th grade, and it only took me 40+ years! Feels good. Feels real good. Suck Sessions. Real good.) I keep wanting to write about HIM, but the Ol’ Pussy Grabber keeps dropping bombshells and dropping jaws and eating cake with the Pope and shit.

Duty to Warn

I watch a lot of the political talk shows – God help me – and read a lot of political news – not much better – and I’m AMAZED by the people who are amazed by the Ol’ Pussy Grabber’s antics. The latest bombshells are blowing up our brains and social media and leaving CNN political talk show hosts dumb founded:

• An old one (pro-tip: it ain’t that old — 10 days ago! See?): the Ol’ Pussy Grabber asks FBI Director Comey to lay off Flynn investigation.
• The Ol’ Pussy Grabber asks the DNI and the NSA director to declare that there is no evidence of collusion.
• He reveals super-duper double secret information to the Ruskies in the Oval Office.
• He confirms to the whole world and god and everybody on international and cable TV in front of an eye-rolling smirking Benjamin Netanyahu that it was Israeli intelligence by proclaiming that he never ever said Israel and intelligence in the same sentence.
• He told Philippines mass murder and purveyor of general atrocities and crimes against humanities, Duterte, the location of a nuclear submarine!
• He admits to obstructing justice by stating in no uncertain terms and unequivocally that he asked Comey to let Flynn alone BECAUSE of the investigation onto Russian meddling into our elections.
• He tells the Russians as much in the Oval Office the day after it happened.

And the list goes on and gets longer with every passing day. It’s like standing on a station platform while a bullet train rushes past: blurry nausea but somehow almost impressive. The sheer hubris of it all is awe inspiring. That is some super-power the Ol’ Pussy Grabber has there, hubris. And people are amazed! AMAZED, I tell you, that he’s doing and saying all this stupid illegal shit. I say, why are you surprised? He’s a fucking narcissist! Do you not understand what that means Jake Tapper, Chuck Todd, Chris Cuomo?

He’s a FUCKING Narcissist!

The Narcissism of Donald J. Trump

Let me tell you what it means: He CANNOT LEARN! It is impossible for him to learn from his mistakes! It is a trait common to all personality disorders. You wanna know why? He cannot feel shame or guilt or embarrassment. Those are the emotions that encourage the rest of us to follow the rules, conform, and try not to get caught when we do something embarrassing like sexually assault women by grabbing them by the pussy. Those emotions don’t apply to narcissists, especially malignant narcissists. Malignant indicates that he also has psychopathic traits (anti-social personality disorder in the DSM lingo), and he is sadistic.

Punishment doesn’t work on these people. They don’t get it. You can’t shame them or guilt-trip them into changing. You saw him defy the incredulity of Lester Holt when he told him why he fired Comey. He shrugged it off like Holt had the problem. Anybody else would’ve been trying to cover up like they’d walked out of the shower into Grand Central Station! Not the Ol’ Pussy Grabber. He doubles down on it daring you to react.

His Biggly WEAK Executive Functioning

Executive Functioning

His narcissism and his weak – and I mean weak, like biggly weak – executive functioning means he has no theory of mind. He cannot imagine what is going on in other people’s minds. He can’t imagine that anyone sees the world any differently than he does. This trait explains why he is so angry that we withhold our praise of his vast and amazing accomplishments (hint hint: you ain’t accomplished anything worthy of praise, and the things you have accomplished, you shouldn’t want credit for). These traits, also, explain  why he lies so much. If he believes it in the moment then he cannot conceive that everyone doesn’t also believe it. It is akin to magical realism, which is amusing and entertaining when Gabriel Marquez uses it in fiction novels but unbelievable when you see a flesh and blood person enacting it. Essentially, if the Ol’ Pussy Grabber thinks it, then it is real. He lives in a fantasy world where all women want him to grab them by the pussy! In which the AHCA actually helps people in the ways he promised. In which it doesn’t matter that he outed a flesh and blood human being to some of the worst torturers in the history of human kind. These factors and these factors alone explain why he is self destructing in such a spectacular way before our very eyes. He isn’t doing anything differently than he has always done. It is just that he is doing it in the intense spotlight and scrutiny of the White House.  He has always been this amoral callous ham-handed bumbling buffoonish oaf. It is just that he is doing on the biggest stage possible.

Vicente Fox Troll Master

Here’s Vicente Fox having a grand old time and being very funny and entertaining as anyone could be trolling the heck out of the Ol’ Pussy Grabber with advice on being president. As advice, it falls on deaf ears. It’s meaningless to someone who shifts between being supremely confident that every little fart that issues forth from his body smells divine and being terrified that he is a no good loser that everyone hates. He believes to his soul that he is helping the poor and middle class, Vicente Fox and the fake news just refuse to admit it.

Entertain us with your epic trolling of the Ol’ Pussy Grabber Vicente Fox, late night talk show hosts, social media commentators young, old, famous, infamous, and mundane, just don’t expect it to change the Ol’ Pussy Grabber. He’s 70 years old and his malignant narcissism is reified. Set in concrete.

Boundaries

We can expect more of the chaotic combative same from him. This is as good as it gets because this is all there is to him. He’s as great a president as he is business person as he is husband as he is father because he is an unproductive malignant narcissistic personality disorder. It is the beginning, end, and entirety of the walking oozing infection that we call the confessed rapist, justice obstructioner, treasonous colluder, and all-round terrible being known as the Ol’ Pussy Grabber.

Check & Balance

The onliest thing you can do with him is put very firm boundaries on him to keep him from doing too much damage. The problem with the firm boundary strategy is that Congress is the chief checker and balancer of any one occupying the White House, and, so far, they don’t seem none too inclined to check and balance his dumb ass.

Our only hope is that we some how survive until the 2018 elections and the Dems at least take the Senate to put those boundaries up. If we don’t retake the Senate, we will eventually have a President Pence, and a President Pence will get the same stuff done at the federal level as he did in Indiana. That is scary shit. That should be enough to get every mo’fo’ to the polls in 2018, but, then again, I thought the prospects of an Ol’ Pussy Grabber taking over from Obama and appointing the likes of Neil Gorsuch to the Supreme Court would’ve meant a bumper crop of votes for Clinton, too, but I was wrong (aside: I know she won the popular vote by 3 million votes, but it shoulda been 10 million. This freaking race shouldna even been close. We all know that. We shouldn’t quibble over the small stuff when we’ve gotta face the big stuff shoulder-to-shoulder.)

The Ol’ Pussy Grabber will continue to do the things hes been doing:

Sold Dirt Cheap

• Fight with Congress
• Sign stupid vapid ineffective executive orders
• Blurt classified information
• Obstruct justice and refuse to cooperate with investigations
• Co-opt more members of Congress
• Make blatant unverified outrageous claims
• Make increasingly hyperbolic verbal assaults on the other branches of government, the media, and the citizenry of our country
• Offer more painfully obvious attempts to cut benefits to fund tax cuts for the wealthy
• Continue gutting regulations that keep us safe, healthy, educated, and functioning as a country
• And, as the 2018 elections get closer, hold more campaign rallies where he verbally assaults opponents and the media, riles the crowds to violence, and make outlandish unverified claims.
• Essentially he’ll be James Buchanon, Andrew Johnson, and Warren G. Harding all rolled up into one blustering blundering backassward buffoon. Expect nothing more than embarrassing ineptitude and incompetence.

He is capable of nothing else. We should under no circumstances normalize this giant slug. Always call him what he is, always call him on his lies, always confront him with the norms he violates, always expect him and his administration to live up to these norms.

#Resisting Authoritarianism

Be ready for them to push back on all of this. Norms need to change, alternate facts, he’s a successful business man. Be ready to put it back in their faces. Every interview should be hostile. Every appearance should be protested. Every congressional person should be called every single fucking day and told to check and balance his goddamned narcissistic ass!

Get angry. Be angry. Stay angry. We must fight for our democracy if we want to keep it!