Just in Time for Kwanzaa: Send the PG some Pussy

If you’re like me, and I know that most people aren’t like me — I KNOW, already, mom! I KNOW! They still read this stupid blog anyway! — you’ve been racking your brain for what to get the Pussy Grabber for Christmas and having utterly failed have been in the depth of despair. Well, now, just in time for Zawadi on Imani, the seventh day of Kwanzaa, you can send the Pussy Grabber PUSSY! His favorite thing in the whole wide world!

Zawadi

When we celebrate Imani on the seventh day of Kwanzaa, we give meaningful zawadi (gifts) to encourage growth, self-determination, achievement, and success. We exchange the gifts with members of our immediate family, especially the children, to promote or reward accomplishments and commitments kept, as well as with our guests. Handmade gifts are encouraged to promote self-determination, purpose, and creativity and to avoid the chaos of shopping and conspicuous consumption during the December holiday season. A family may spend the year making kinaras or may create cards, dolls, or mkekas to give to their guests. Accepting a gift implies a moral obligation to fulfill the promise of the gift; it obliges the recipient to follow the training of the host. The gift cements social relationships, allowing the receiver to share the duties and the rights of a family member. Accepting a gift makes the receiver part of the family and promotes Umoja.

Kwanzaa History.com

Send Pussy to Trump

grinchSee? We give meaningful gifts that encourage growth, self-determination, achievement, and success! What could encourage the Pussy Grabber to grow, achieve, and be successful like a PUSSY?!? If he receives enough of them, he might, he just might, find his heart growing quite Grinch-like three sizes. He might, just might, realize that women are people, too, and not just sex objects for his personal enjoyment and consumption. And just as the Grinch understood the true meaning of Christmas, the Pussy Grabber might understand the true meaning of being an American. If he accepts the gift — and how could the old Pussy Grabber not accept the thousands of pussies he’s been sent — he morally obligates himself to fulfill the promise of the gift! He might. Really. He might. It could happen. Stop laughing. It’s worth a try.

pussyonastick-jpg
Finally, a Way 2 STP (wonkette.com)

Apparently, an enterprising LGBTQ high school couple, Jules & Gabe, have created Pussy on a Stick or a pussy shaped — but probably not pussy-tasting since there is such a wide variety of tastes, or so my friends have told me — lollipops that they will ship to the Pussy Grabber at his pussy grabbing HQ in New York City for the low low price of $3.99 (US).  They have a website, registered in Denmark since you know doxing and other fun alt.right games, called Send Trump Pussy. Kids these days. This is what comes from providing them with maker spaces, amirite? I’m sure the Pussy Grabbers Sec of Ed will stamp this nonsense right out!

This whole send a pussy to the Pussy Grabber thing has a cosmic balanced beauty to it, too. Because if the pussies can melt the old misogynist racist narcissist’s heart, then they will have saved the world. A pussy lollipop is the perfect live giving antidote to the world destroying power of Anthony Weiner’s wiener. Man, it makes my head spin to think about it.

The Seven Days of Kwanzaa

This whole zawadi thing and the seven days of Kwanzaa is not only a god send but picture perfect. The seven days of Kwanzaa are celebrated from 26 December to 1 January. Each day has a different theme and they all seem to match the resist the Pussy Grabber movement.

Let me list for you the seven days of Kwanzza since this is an educational blog.

  • 26 December: Umoja (oo-MOH-jah): Unity, as in unity in resistance!
  • 27 December: Kujichagulia (koo-jee-chah-goo-LEE-ah): Self-Determination, as in we can determine our future through resisting the Pussy Grabber!
  • 28 December: Ujima (oo-JEE-mah): Collective work and responsibility, as in we have to work together and responsibly if we are to successfully resist the Pussy Grabber.
  • 29 December: Ujamaa (oo-jah-MAH): Collective economics, as in our economy and well-being comes from our collective selves. We are all in this together!
  • 30 December: Nia (NEE-ah): Purpose, as in our purpose is to not allow the Pussy Grabber to whittle away our democracy and rights!
  • 31 December: Kuumba (koo-OOM-bah): Creativity, as in resistance will take creativity to be effective — like sending the pussy lollipops to the Pussy Grabber.
  • 1 January: Imani (ee-MAH-nee): Faith, as in, we must have faith in the righteousness of our cause.

Every year the regressive forces hold sway over our government, none of us celebrate Christmas, and we all celebrate Kwanzaa. It is for the cause! What do ya say?

The Pussy Extravaganza!

Now, for your enjoyment all of the interesting Creative Commons images that resulted when I searched for pussy!

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