Now that Franken, Conyers, and Franks have all resigned for their sexual indiscretions, and we’ve all come down from our pipe dream that Doug Jones can too defeat the Moorelester, we can now turn our attention to understanding this mixed up, muddled up, shook up world. Now that we’ve tossed the groper, the demander, and the surrogater out of Congress, we’re about to elect a molester? Of course we have the Pussy Grabber-in-Chief paying pee hookers to piss on the Resolute Desk and everything America stands for (allegedly, or at least I am speculating wildly about it here and now), so why would we be surprised that a child molester — he has admitted to having “dated” teen-aged girls somewhere in the twisted maze of focus-group tested utterances, ain’t that right Mrs Moorelester?

FestivusOriginsSeriously, what the fuck gives? What can account for this schizophrenic split personality approach that we take to our politics nowadays? Or have we always been this partisan and hypocritical and win at all costs? I’m only an amateur historian, so we won’t be exploring the latter, but I am a psychology dilettante, so we’ll be psysplaining the former. As always, I adhere to the belief that if we can make a good diagnosis, we can select a good treatment, which will lead to a good outcome. And, I hope that we’ll help you keep the peace with your favorite drunk uncle around the Festivus Pole this holiday season.

Moral Foundation Theory

We can add Moral Foundations Theory to our already rich tapestry of explanatory explanations of inexplicable human behavior. The idea is that there are five (+1) psychological foundations of our morality or is that moral foundations of our psychology? I don’t know. I can’t ever keep some of this shit straight. I guess that’s why I’m blogging about the application of psychology and not actually applying psychology for some lucrative paycheck.

These five moral traits are the underpinning of our species-wide intuitive morality. Morality varies greatly across cultures and time, but there are themes that seem to run through it all. The theory was dreamed up by Jonathan Haidt et al. They’re all a bunch of social psychologists, and we all know what that bunch is like. I’ll list them here, and I’m sure you’ll recognize some of my most favoritest themes in them:

  • harm-care: This continuum refers to empathy. The more you act out of concern for the well-being of others, the more you are driven by care. The more you are willing to tolerate or cause pain and discomfort to others, harm.
  • sanctity-degradation: Evolution has favored those traits that react with disgust to typical disease carrying agents: feces, rotting food, and other things (the Moorelester and the Ol’ Pussy Grabber?) that make you go Ewww! Get the fuck away from me! Now, I’ve gotta go home and take a shower. Because those who didn’t react to disgusting things with disgust, all got sick and died before they could pass their traits on.
  • loyalty-betrayal: We are social animals. We form groups. We form social groups in order to do things. Human beings work best in groups. Ingroups encourage loyalty, but some ingroups encourage more loyalty than others.
  • authority-subversion: Social Dominance Theory, anyone? Our societies are organized through social hierarchies some higher than others, though. Get it? Get it? Hierarchies. Higher than others? Get it? Hier? Higher? Man, I just crack myself up sometimes.
  • fairness-cheating: This continuum encompasses the idea of reciprocity and proportionality. It is the reason that every child and teenager intuitively knows to needle their parents and teachers with It’s not fair! We have this need for things to be fair either through doing unto others as they have to you or making sure that our treatment of others is in proportion to how we’ve been treated.
  • liberty-subversion: The official +1 candidate for inclusion as one of the psychological foundations of our moral. How much or how little do you mind being dominated, bossed around, or otherwise controlled?

Iffin’ you want to know how you fair on these scales of morality and stack up to your peers, kin, and country folk, you can clicky the clicking thingee and visit their questionnaires page (you have to register to participate, though). It’s great lots of fun to answer all their little questions about how much you value snapping the heads off of wickets or stitching the legs of children together or nailing an opponents head to a coffee table. And, if you have something that you’re procrastinating on doing — Christmas shopping, maybe? — you can feel very productive and get absolutely nothing done while feeling pretty darn good about contributing to real honest to god science!

Applying Moral Foundation Theory

Funnily enough, the research from this group finds that certain moral foundations correlate with certain groups. A well known one is that liberals are stuck on fairness and conservatives, sanctity. But, there are other insights to be had.

BrockTurnerMeme
ALL Men, Evolution Argument

We all know that I believe that ALL MEN are rapists waiting for the moment when we will strike. It’s sad, but true. One of the chiefest things that it hinges on is empathy or care vs. harm. And, we can take each and every one of our sexual predators listed above and all the others that have and will populate the news and our lives and be very sure of one thing. When these men were sexually aggressing against their victims, their empathy levels were extraordinarily low and the harm tolerating side of their moral continuum was activated. They were much more willing to tolerate harming others than perhaps they normally were or they were in other situations. I would also wager that if you asked them in that moment, the Al Frankens of our world wouldn’t’ve even  thought that they were causing harm when they were grabbing the ass of whoever was posing for a picture with them.

That’s what makes it all so very confusing. Al Franken’s female staffers and co-stars stood up and came together to shout with one voice, he’s a good guy. And, that could be true and co-exist with his ass grabbing ways. Good guys grope, too. It’s the situation, not necessarily the person.

Narcissism, Harm, Care, and Empathy

freudzcouch
Diagnosing the Ol’ Pussy Grabber

Frankens, Conyer, and Franks all rate pretty high on the narcissism scale. Most publicly known people do. It really is the only way you can tolerate the life. And, we know from our study of the Ol’ Pussy Grabber that narcissists don’t believe the rules apply to them.  It ain’t okay for Calico the lowly blogger to grab ’em by the pussy, but it surely it’s okay for the celebrity “billionaire” to, right? It ain’t okay for just any old run-of-the-mill middle class feller to rape a fourteen year-old, but it’s okay for an up and coming district attorney who has asked her mama for permission to rape her, amirite Moorelester? You see what I mean here? That narcissism goes a long way to excusing any wrong doing because it ain’t a mere mortal doing the wrongs… It’s my right as an entertainer! Sound familiar? Probably did happen given the levels of entitlement that come along with higher levels of narcissism.

Fairness: What is Fair?

An AP Photo from the Washington Examiner http://www.washingtonexaminer.com/major-newspapers-hold-fire-on-al-franken-in-contrast-to-roy-moore/article/2641022
Moore, Franken, Halos, and Hive Minds

This begs the question, why are the Dems so bent on getting rid of popular high-profile elected Congress people and the Repubes just bent, er, I mean, seemingly just as bent on accepting a child molester into the Senate? Liberals tend to the fairness end of the spectrum. We get hung up on equality, fairness, decency, and humanity. Every liberal reading this is nodding along in agreement scratching her ass wondering what else could be as important? Conservatives — if any conservative has read this far — is thinking that they are being being fair and equal and decent and humane, too, because they don’t coddle people and make ’em dependent on government handouts like liberals do. They want them to pull themselves up by their bootstraps and think for themselves, which is a way of being fair and equal and decent. Their reasoning is that it is unfair to have god-fearing hard-working middle class white people support all the lazy mooching browns.

Liberals and conservatives see the world through fundamentally different lenses. Liberals want an even application of the rules as they see them. This excludes the it’s okay if Hillary does it critique that conservatives like to throw about. If sexual predation is wrong, it’s wrong when Franken does it and when the Moorelester does it, too.

Because Bill Clinton: Loyalty

I know, Bill Clinton. But, there were, including me, people who said he was abusing his position and was being a sexual predator way back in the late 90’s when it was all going down. However, there were a bunch more insisting that it was okay. We cannot ignore the role of partisan politics in these choices and decisions. It doesn’t take a genius to recognize this reaction as loyalty. He’s your  guy even if he is a sexual predator, at least he’s your sexual predator, and he’s voting for your policy positions and laws.

Dems were loyal to Clinton even though many had doubts. Repubes are loyal to the Moorelester even though there is little room for doubt. Libs say be fair: give the accusers their day, the accusations are credible, he should step down. Cons say it don’t matter how we win as long as we win — honest, conservatives have been saying that about Russia buying the Ol’ Pussy Grabber — so why would they mind a child molester as long as his election allows them to give needless destructive tax breaks to the wealthy and wring every last cent from the middle class! Won’t Dems win one of the elections and set it all right again. So, what does it matter? They’ll destroy the fucking country that’s what it matters, but that’s a blog post for another time.

Give Me Liberty or Let’s Sell Out to Putin To WIN WIN WIN!

FranklinRepublicMEME
A Republic, If You Can Keep It

The last one we’ll cover is liberty-subversion. It’s application to the political landscape of sexual predation is an interesting one, too. In fact, it is as twisted as Matt Lauer’s sexual proclivities are. Conservatives come down on the liberty side of things. They don’t like no way no how the man and big brotha from another motha telling them what to do! Just ask the Bundys about all that there nonsense. In many ways, the conservative reaction to accusations of sexual harassment is that women are subverting the liberty of the men involved. It is bad enough that rich white guys can boss other white guys around; conservatives are not going to stand for black guys and women being the boss of them, too!

With this interpretation, we get the perversion that a real live human being is less important than another. The man’s desire to handle and treat women in degrading sexual ways is more important than the sanctity of her body and her life. She is less important than he is.

Is that stance or belief surprising, though? This is the same bunch that brought you slavery and Jim Crow and pull-yourself-up-by-your-bootstraps. They start out looking at the world like it is uneven and unfair. Some people are just more equal than others. White supremacy is literally encoded in their world-view. The Moorelester believes that all of the amendments to the Constitution after the tenth one should be abolished! No more votes for blacks or women! No more equal protection and due process! Hello slavery and poll taxes! It is just a small small step from believing it, but only letting it slip out occasionally, to electing the Moorelester who is willing to say it, to enacting it and doing it. Ain’t that what’s happening with all this voter registration and election fraud nonsense? Aren’t we already on this slippery slope struggling for footing?

Arguing With Your Favorite Drunk Uncle

BorderEntry
Red States Treat Blue States

One way social psychology-types think we can use these dichotomies is by changing the way we argue with one another. Instead of trying to argue fairness, which conservatives will never see, we argue for our positions using loyalty — the people of Puerto Rico are Americans! But, they don’t see the browns and Muslims and people who live in California as Americans. We are all foreigners. And, foreigners are treated as if they are disease-carrying disgusting abominations before god. We can’t argue for being loyal to fellow Americans when the only people who count in their eyes as fellow Americans is a narrow slice of white Americana.

Okay, well, we can argue from authority. There is the rule of law. It is hard to argue from the rule of law, though, when we (a) don’t trust the FBI unless it is persecuting commie-pinko fags or (b) declare all science and professional reporters, fake news. When we declare the only law that matters is that of gawd which conservatives are the only authorize mouthpiece of, ain’t that right, Moorelester?

Now the problem starts to come into stark relief: if we continue down this road, we will soon run out of commonalities. We won’t have any agreement upon which to relate, govern, or live together. We will cease to share a culture.

Just like the villain in all the super-hero movies who’s bent on destroying the world and everything, what’s the end game? The villain and her minions cannot live on a destroyed world any better than the super-heroes can. If we destroy any sense of commonality between conservative and liberal in the US of A, what will be left with? Will we even have a country left? Will we have a diminished US and a Putin-controlled rump US?

Will we then truly be the United Fucking States of Fucking Stupid?