From the Spam Queue: E-Waste Recycling, Pandora, & Non-Surgical Nose Jobs, the Wonders of Commenting Bots

I’m often amused by the spam that comes through the comment section. I usually sift through them before deleting them; it is a great procrastination technique! And, I have found legitimate comments that for whatever reason ended up being sorted into the spam section. I think there were two in the past four years, so the odds are not high.

I’ve also thought often about publishing some of the more amusing ones. Some of the people — or AI programs — writing these comments can come pretty close to sounding like a legitimate reader commenting on a post. Others are just ridiculous in their assemblage of words and phrases trying to sound erudite. And, the ones that are just lists of URL’s containing malware or worse are just disappointing — does anyone ever click on those things? Really?

But this one, dear reader, is something to behold. It is truly worth sharing, so allow me to indulge my Monty Python-esque sense of humor by presenting it to you in it’s complete unadulterated entirety.

” E-waste Recycling Market is classified on the basis of product type as Infocomm Technology (ICT) Equipment, Household Appliances, Consumer Electronics and others. There is a movement of characters between Earth and Pandora (a habitable moon beyond Earth.8. Consequently non-surgical nose jobs are perfect for the people with stumpy resistance levels and also kids. There are various other comparable government agencies and you can search for them online where they display a checklist of their accredited colleges on their websites for the general public to scan. In this part, the report presents the company profile, product specifications, capacity, production value, and 2015-2023 market shares for each company. The report then estimates 2018-2023 market development trends of Cable Waterproof Joint industry. PET is generally used in the synthetic fibers that are used in manufacturing of containers used for the packaging of food, beverage and other liquids. People say laughter is great medication for the heart, soul and mind. Many are actually aware that graduates of associate programs are offered the same eligibility to become RNS, and also the exact same entry-level employment opportunities as any four-year course can offer.

Nearest Airport – Jolly Grant AirportNearest Railway Station – Dehradun KurfiKurfi is one of the highest places in India for mountain snow skiing. It looks gross and hampers any progress you made towards looking good.”

From the spam queue of the comment section

It caught my eye because I had recently had a conversation about e-waste recycling — it being the first time I had heard of e-waste, I had imagined it being undeleted emails accumulating in your inbox, unfinished documents on your hard drive, and other wasted bits, bytes, and pixels inherent in using our electronic devices — so I read it more closely. It could’ve been something worthwhile, right?

But then, I hit the second sentence, “There is a movement of characters between Earth and Pandora…” and was hoping for some snarky take on between here and New York City, or between here and the moon, or one of the many other uses of the phrase. I was richly rewarded, though, and I hope you were, too, by the “…habitable moon beyond Earth.8.” This had real promise even if “Earth.8.” looked like a probable typo instead of some paranoid delusion of an eighth experimental earth existing somewhere in the vicinity of Pandora.

I was thrilled, but, also, disappointed, by the “Consequently, non-surgical nose jobs…” segue. There is a rich absurdity to the rest of it, but it lacked the coherence of an intentionally snarky and sarcasticky crazy comment. If it could have continued on about beings from Pandora intercepting our e-waste and building a super-weapon or some such, I would have been over the moon. Instead, I just chuckled to myself at the improbability of an AI comment bot producing such blather and wondering what the purpose of it all was.

If you can discern some reason for sending out masses of these things, please let me know in the comments, which, hopefully, won’t be lost in the spam queue.

3 comments

  1. It’s not word salad, but clearly Sentence Salad. I have to conclude that it was assembled by a bot or a non-English speaker (or, both). The point of the thing is mysterious. Could it be Troll Bait in which the idea is to get somebody to take off on one sentence out of it?

    Liked by 1 person

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