#IveBeenThatGuy (after #metoo )

I like the hashtag #IveBeenThatGuy. It says it all. And, I think if we are all very very honest and brave and understand the impact of our actions, we all have been. It’s like going to the bathroom. Most of us don’t like to talk about it very explicitly, and are a little embarrassed by it, but we all do it and refer to it on occasion.

I don’t think that we have to give details. I think you can tweet and post #IveBeenThatGuy and it will be sufficient.

What do y’all think?

So Brightly Black

In light of the current #meToo movement (and previously #yesallwomen), many amazing friends and survivors have reminded me that, while pointing out how shamefully prevalent sexism, sexual harassment, and sexual assault are, is terribly important, maybe survivors shouldn’t feel obligated to relive their trauma? Shouldn’t us men feel MORE obligated to take responsibility? The fact is, as both the beneficiaries of privilege and the vast, vast majority of the time—the perpetrators of rape culture—MEN MUST TAKE RESPONSIBILITY. We must bear the burden of the work if the problem will ever be fixed. Helping those heal who have been hurt is terribly important—the only thing that would be even better is if we stop patriarchy, sexual harassment, and sexual assault from happening in the first place—and that can only happen when those of us who are most responsible challenge ourselves to take responsibility.
So I would genuinely Love it if any…

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